Category: Trust in yourself

  • You deserve to be happy! Really?

    You deserve to be happy! Really?

    You deserve to be happy!
    I’ve heard this so many times, it makes me sick.

    If you listen to a friend, a therapist or a shrink , not to mention your parents, siblings or spouse, you will hear this a lot. “You are a good person and you’ve suffered so much, you deserve to be happy”.

    But, by whose laws?

    Because the world, the universe, has a different set of laws then we humans created. We are all centered on the idea of justice. Good person = happiness.
    Neehhh, that’s utopia. That doesn’t happen just like that. The more you look around, the more you realize goodness often means unhappiness.
    We do good and we expect to be done good.

    So, I am sick and tired of hearing “you deserve to be happy”. It should be:  there is nothing you deserve. You do not act in order to deserve something, to receive something. The way you act, and by this I understand “think, feel, act”, it concerns only you, it is about how it makes you feel, in the inside, and not what you receive from the outer world.

    Happiness is grown within. You may receive slices of it from the outside. Simple things that trigger a blissful state. A song,  clothes, shoes, food, rewards, good grades or  a good laugh. But they pass. They are sparkles that go away.

    I should believe I deserve to be happy, they say. I should deeply believe that.

    But I don’t.

    Like a secret they discovered and share with you. In order to succeed you need to believe, to know it as a fact, that I am worthy of happiness. Like a birth right.

    But, am I?
    Are we?

    We don’t come here equally. I’m white, you are black. Short, tall, dark haired, blue eyed etc. Different. All of us. Some good, some mean. Yes, even from birth. Don’t tell me we are all pure stem cells when we are born, because we are not. It’s visible.
    We go different ways, choose different paths, become even more different. Do we all deserve to be happy? Should we all believe we are worthy of happiness? Even a sociopath? A terrorist? A rapist? A cold-blood killer?
    Because I’m sure they have a loved one who tells them they deserve happiness.

    How to accept life as it is?

    As long as I do not what is my purpose here on Earth, I cannot say I deserve this or that.

    I function after my own set of laws. Because the Universe has its own set, which is quite hard to break, and I have a feeling that these laws do not favor us.

    So, if I choose to feel in a certain way, or be kind to someone, I do it not expecting anything. From the universe or the people.

    And I know, deeply know, that I don’t deserve to be happy more that my neighbor,  or the homeless down the street does.

    So, people, you are free to believe whatever you like. Whatever comforts and fuels you. Just let me be as I am. Happy or not. don't be afraid to be different

     

    pictures credit: pixabay.com

  • Do you trust spiritual teachers? I don’t. At all.

    Do you trust spiritual teachers? I don’t. At all.

    I don’t trust spiritual teachers, motivational people. Somehow I have nothing against motivational texts, though I believe some of them are completely wrong and misunderstood.  But all the persons teaching us how to live our lives, seem to be self-hypnotized.

    They are either too enthusiastic about their truths, or too theatrical, telling a lesson well learned with out blinking.  All TED people are so sure on themselves, speak so easily, fluently and smartly that this puts them on such a high level, that makes us feel stupid and inferior.
    You get the feeling the speaker’s truth was there all the time and you didn’t see it, but now you understand and you will change yourself.

    You leave the room energized by words that actually hit your brain with their obvious clarity and truthfulness and feel you can change all your world from now on.

    But how long will this last? Maximum 3 days.

    I don’t like and I don’t trust these spiritual gurus, that are so evolved and enlighten that are teaching us the way to happiness and freedom in exchange for real, earthly, material money. They must live, you may say. Really? And have 5 cars, 3 beach houses and live in a tropical part of the world? At least?

    I don’t trust them, not because they charge us to share a piece of wisdom, but because they are selling their truth.
    Which is their truth! Is there a supreme judge to say they’re right? At this moment in your life, it feels right, agree. But this doesn’t make it a universal valid truth.

    To me, this kind of info, this wisdom they gained, should not be sold for money. Did Christ sell his wisdom? Did Buddha do that? Who, among the big spiritual teachers of the world sold their wisdom for money?

    Did Einstein requested money to share the theory of relativity? And, this theory, is biiiig, indeed!

    Now, our preaching spiritual teacher ask money in return to telling us the 5 things that makes us realize we are free, but are blind enough to not see it for ourselves!

    And how unconsidered and disrespectful to say that these 5 things apply to everybody. Tell this to a woman in Philippine, an abandoned child or a 7 years old child with cancer. A starving man in Africa.

    Here are some pictures, for you great spiritual teachers who preach living in the present moment and enjoying the hidden beauty of our own person! From FB, credit unknown.

    I hate spiritual teachers

    Anyway, my point is that that the way spiritual teachers of today talk to us is suspicious from the start. If you wouldn’t hear them, just look at their body language, and face, you could notice either a frenzy or an unjustified stillness. They look either drunk or sedated. And the drunk ones seem more dangerous.

    Their videos are so professionally made, so calculated, so expressive, that make you thing they are scams. Which is not necessarily true but trigger the idea that a lot of money have been invested there – meaning only one thing: at the end of the video, they are going to ask you for money!

    In fact, sometimes these people even sound like an ad on the shopping channel.

    Getting drunk with a word!

    Communism. Socialism. Power. Money. Salvation. Purity. Mercy. Love. Democracy. Health. Cancer. Singing. Children. Travelling.

    There are people who are driven by a single word their entire life. Drunk with it.

    Balance was never an easy thing to acquire.

    What’s your word?
    Hmm, that’s something I should reflect on myself. “Find your word.” – a meditation subject.

    Along history there were always people convinced they discovered the perfect recipe to happiness. It took different names: Buddhism, Christian-ism, spiritualism, or “living-in-the-now”.  All these are paths towards an unseen and always wanted Heaven. Because here, we actually live in Hell.

    Because why would you want happiness unless you are unhappy?

    The funny thing is that more than finding the path, we want to find a mentor. A guru, a teacher. A person to trust in. To rely on. A person who can vouch for the path to happiness. A god.

    Probably we were taught to rely on somebody else and listen to it. And yes, it comes from childhood. It’s mother who we trust from the beginning. Or a brother. An uncle. A wife. A boss.
    And we become so accustomed to listening to a boss, that we imagine God as the supreme boss, we should all fear and obey.

    Yeah… something is so not right in this picture.

    In a time when we work from home, we have our own businesses, are entrepreneurs, do we still need The Big Boss?
    I don’t think so.
    Yet, we are so few of us.

    But here is my message to all asking-for-money spiritual teachers: you are nothing else than spiritual scams.

    Do you guys trust them?
    Have you paid them, tried their methods?
    Did it work?

  • Where is the power hidden?

    Where is the power hidden?

    Creation said:
    “I want to hide something from the humans until they are ready for it.
    It is the realization that they create their own reality.”

    The eagle said,
    “Give it to me. I will take it to the moon.”

    The Creator said, “No. One day they will go there and find it.”

    The salmon said,
    “I will bury it on the bottom of the ocean.”

    The Creator said, “No. They will go there, too.”

    The buffalo said, “I will bury it on the Great Plains.”

    The Creator said, “They will cut into the skin of the earth and find it even there.”

    Grandmother who lives in the breast of Mother Earth and who has no physical eyes but sees with spiritual eyes, said “Put it inside of them.”

    And the Creator said, “It is done.”

    Creation story from the Hopi Nation, Arizona

  • What to do to be loved. It’s not easy to be a woman…

    What to do to be loved. It’s not easy to be a woman…

    What to do to be loved?

    For some reason, women have been born to be more sensitive and more emotional than men. For this reason it is said they need love more than men do. ( the majority, of course. )

    You might say they have misunderstood the whole thing, as it’s not about been loved, but about loving.  But I think the need of been loved belongs to the category of protection. When we feel loved, we feel protected. This gives confidence, trust, relaxation and peace.

    So, we have an excuse. 🙂 We need to be loved, liked. Admired. To feel protected. And if this doesn’t happen quickly, then we start searching for tricks that can help us. Because if, for example, from the whole class with 20 girls only 5 of them have boyfriends, it means the others do not the necessary standard. It means they are not good enough. But mostly, not beautiful enough.

    Why would a girl think she is not beautiful enough?
    Well, have you look at the models of today? Not those in the fashion business, but those that appear in each and every commercial? On every website that you open, every market that you walk in, on buildings, on walls, everywhere. Amazingly beautiful women are smiling at you, with immaculate perfect teeth. Telling you… to buy something, of course. And in most cases, the things that they sell are products meant to make you as beautiful as they are.

    Or they are famous actresses, with the chance of being born beautiful. Yet, do you really know how happy they were when they were 20 years old? Or 30?

    what to do to be loved

    It’s a standard that they promote. Beautiful arched eyebrows, small nose, big colored eyes, big voluptuous lips, and perfect complexion. If you had the misfortune of not been born like this, then you are in big trouble.

    This is how marketing changes our lives. It tells us we are not good enough so we need to buy X product, and do X to our body, to fit in this “perfect” society and get loved.

    And what do we do? We fall into this traps, of course. And begin a constant struggle against our defects.

    1. We modify our face in all possible ways: inject everything into it, tatoo the eyebrows in ways that imitate models’ eyebrows, but do not fit our face, inflate our lips through different painful methods, and especially apply tons of powder and make-up on our face.  And so many others.

    2. Keep a strict diet. Because it’s such a shame to be 30 and have a little belly….omg…

    keep a doet if you want to be beautiful

    3. Exercise. We say it’s for our health. But we are lying. To us and everybody who asks. We exercise only to have a beautifully shaped body. And then, to socialize, to see how other girls are and to flirt with men.

    4. We wear terribly uncomfortable high heels. And we do it till we get addicted to them and forget how to walk on sand!

    Women are prepared to do ANYTHING to make others love them!

    5. Go through surgical procedures to enlarge their boobs with silicon bags. And our back. It needs to be naughty, right?

    6. Buy lots of clothes. Lots. Expensive ones. Give money on unnecessary garments that we stop wearing after taking it for 3 times.

    7. And mostly, DO STUPID THINGS.
    Things that are not habitual to us. Laughing out loud without reason only to draw attention, dancing too provocative, picking on somebody for no reason, obeying to crowd  rules, lying, drinking too much, smoking just to be cool….
    Having sex with someone just to show you are not a moron.

    Things that you do only to fit it. To be accepted. To be liked and loved. 

    Stronger characters realize the trap and don’t fall in. Scientists, morons they form like a different social class, like a different species, and stick with their science. They see it as highly superior to beauty and popularity and act contrary to all the other. Just to show how different they are.

    This is defense, as well. Another way of protecting themselves.

    And, of course, there are women who have found strong men to lean on. And are very confident in their own naked, un-makeuped power. See Keely Shaye Smith – wife of Pierce Brosnan, Deborra-Lee Furness – wife of Huge Jackman, Priscilla Chan – wife of Mark Zuckerberg and so many others. Who seem to be happy. Well, at least I haven’t read anything about their problems.

    It is said, but nobody seems to believe this anymore, that beauty comes from the inside.

    What inside, for god sake? When we are tired, stressed out with the job, kids, food, weather, our health, our grandparents and so many other…

    And mostly,

    how can we show our beautiful inside when we have thin lips and a big nose?

    It is hilarious, I know. Painful, too.
    But we don’t know one essential thing:

    It’s not about beauty. It’s about being pleasant.

    beautiful vs pleasant

    Take a look at this picture. It’s a drawing, of course, but it doesn’t represent one beautiful woman face, no princess, no fairy. Only a smiling face. When you look at it, it’s not about what you see, but about what it transmits to you. And this picture transmits happiness.

    It’s about the smile and the light in her eyes. Warm, relaxed, confident, positive. It makes you smile back to her. You don’t see the color of the hair, or her eyebrows. Just one delightful girl.

    Be like that.

    Don’t torture your body unnecessary.  In your life you need only one person to love you like you are the entire universe. To bring you peace. And that person will recognize you after the light in your eyes. And after your smile.

    That beauty that comes from the inside is on an illusion. It is not beauty that you see when your look at a cheerful, pleasant person. It’s a state. A feeling. It’s beautiful positive energy. And this makes everybody beautiful. Whether she has hives or not. Or thin lips. Or regular eyes.

    I’m not saying that we should not wear makeup. Only that we should keep this into common sense borders, and not make it a priority.
    Let’s always be conscious that we are victims of advertising. Of false images created with a purpose.

    Those that look only for a picture, are of no interest for you.